You come on with your come-ons, you don't fight fair
That's O.K., see if I care!
Knock me down, it's all in vain
I'll get right back on my feet again! ~ Pat Benatar
March. What a month. Let's just say 2011 has been interesting overall. January and February were a blur of white with all the snow and school cancellations which led to business closings too. Then we come upon March.
What can I say, I started the month filled with excitement of the hall being booked up all but two days. I also had a lot of positive momentum in other areas as well. Only a couple of down days where I just felt run down, not emotionally down. Yeah, there were some personal issues but nothing that can't be worked out in the long run.
Well, the physical came to a head last weekend. Sheesh, it seems so far away now. I love how time works like that. It creates a distance from an experience/situation like nothing else. You can drive away to put distance between you and that thing but I've found only time is the best resource.
So last weekend, actually it started last Thursday, the 24th. If you read the previous blog, you know I ended up with kidney stones. Two about the size of an eye booger. 2 Millimeters. I can't believe the amount of pain those f*ckers caused.
I took myself off the pain meds on Monday. I hated how I felt on them. Loved sleeping but now my sleep pattern is all out of whack. (Weird phrase out-of-whack). Tuesday came and went with minimal work. I had canceled my appointments that day too and went to work that night at the hall but left early because I was run down and sore. Wednesday I taught class in the morning, saw a client and then two others in the early evening. Ended up with a slight fever that night and went home early again.
Thursday. Once again, Thursday. The day started out nice and simple. I went to my son's parent teacher conference. Turns out he's just like me. Extremely smart and feels school is beneath him so why bother doing the work. Unreal. Sins of the father oops mother revisited. Ugh. He's doing well in school - A's and B's but without any effort. The teacher thinks he'd do well in a Magnet school so I have to look into that this week. It might be too late for next year. Hopefully there is an opportunity for him.
That night found me at the hall again. Covering the counter for the people who rent it for the night. The instructor needed someone to help out. So I went. I stayed until about 9pm, then headed out the the car. Carrying my briefcase and pocketbook, I walked out into the downpour of heavy snow and rain. YUCK! As I got a few feet from the door I watched a car out of the corner of my eye pull through an empty space heading toward me. I thought, "He doesn't see me." Now my business is right next door do a hockey rink. The same place my son played and husband still plays at.
As I think this, sure enough, he picks up a little speed, again just eased through the empty space and turns toward me. I picked up my pace enough to find myself on the driver's side but still in front of the car. I took the front of the car on my left side (opposite the briefcase with computer and pocketbook - priorities you know). I don't know how it happened but I managed to keep my feet moving while leaning against the front of the car and get beyond it without being knocked down.
It was all surreal. I can still see it, feel it, hear it, everything from that moment. It truly felt like what you watch in a movie. A part of me wonders if I wasn't pushed out of me by something so that something could be in control in that moment. I really feel like I viewed the whole scenario from outside of me.
I don't truly believe I was ever in danger of losing my life...major damage to my body, sure that was possible, probable even. Surprising that it didn't happen.
Oh and the poor guy. He was in shock too. He asked if I was okay. Sure I was but I was wet and upset and just wanted to get out of the rain/snow. I told him I'd be fine. I think at this point in my life I have a fairly good grasp on who I am, what my body is like and what not (the kidney stone incident doesn't apply here). I just wanted him to leave so I could put distance between me and the incident. He did. So I got in the car and cried. For a moment.
Then I drove home, shaking a bit. Knowing my husband and possibly the kids would be up. M was sitting with my husband. He was on the computer, she was watching TV. W had gone to bed. I went directly to the bathroom to see what I looked like and if I had any bruises. Nope, just wet.
I went back into the living room, sat down and said, "Um, so I was just hit by a car while I walked out of the hall to my car." M was concerned, hubby to a small extent but was caught up with something on the pc and obviously if I was there telling the story I must have been ok.
I put M to bed and said goodnight to W who was still up. Then my husband asked me how I was. I told him shook up. It was definitely a shock.
No black and blues but very sore body. My right knee is bothering me but I think it is a re-injuring of an old issue. I'll deal with it.
I've gone about my weekend and once again my sleep is off. I decided to get up and write it all out. There is much more that just has to do with family drama but for now I figured I'd get this out of my system.
I am fine. I survived two kidney stones and getting hit by a car all in one week. I can't help but laugh. March is done. April is here. So far so good. I do admit, I'm nervous while walking in a parking lot. Especially if I see a bright blue car. I'll be on guard for a while I suppose.
I didn't get knocked down. I'm still standing. Oooh a new song, I'll leave you with this:
Don't you know I'm still standing better than I ever did
Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid
I'm still standing after all this time
Picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind
I'm still standing yeah yeah yeah
I'm still standing yeah yeah yeah ~ Elton John
